The NBA's Worst Tattoos: 20-11
The NBA's Worst Tattoos: 20-11
20. Carmelo Anthony's "Who Can I Trust" Tattoo
Evidently not your tattoo artist, 'Melo. All caps and missing punctuation make this look more like a text message than a tattoo.
19. Brad Miller's Scrappy Doo Tattoo
Miller makes the list again with another thoroughly confusing tattoo. My only guess is that Brad was an unusually large child who somehow convinced the tattoo parlour that he was eighteen and used his pocket money on a tat of his favourite mystery-solving dog.
18. DeShawn Stevenson's Abraham Lincoln Five-Dollar Bill Tattoo
I imagine there aren't many of you asking why this one made the list, although some may be wondering why it only checks in at number eighteen. Don't get me wrong now: I agree that this is a supremely poor idea for a tattoo, and in the hierarchy of good ideas an Abe Lincoln neck tattoo ranks somewhere between a paper umbrella and throwing a cup at Ron Artest. That said, this one at least doesn't look terrible, which saves it from cracking the top ten.
17. Eddy Curry's "Bruised Never Broken" Tattoo
Before you ask, I have no idea why these photos were taken. Either they're the most uninspiring before-and-after weight-loss shots I've ever seen, or Eddy joined an online dating site for the overweight. Whatever the case, Curry's "Bruised Never Broken" ink jumped from ironic to just plain incorrect about three injuries ago. Please also note the gaudy "HOME" and "TEAM" tats running down either biceps.
16. J.R. Smith's Transformers Tattoos
You know what's even dumber than these tattoos? This quote:
"I got the tattoos about a month-and-a-half ago. I like the second 'Transformers' movie better. I like how they brought some of the old characters back." - J.R. Smith
There isn't a decent photo out right now, but there's an Autobot logo on the other side in addition to this Deception design. That's right: One Transformers tattoo was not sufficient for Earl Smith. If they weren't so small, they'd be a lock for the top ten.
15. Marquis Daniels' Chinese Symbols Tattoo
"Those are my initials in Chinese."
No, they're not. For one thing, it's not even possible to render English initials in Chinese. Instead of the desired "MAD", Marquis Daniels actually ended up inked with the symbols for "healthy", "woman" and "roof". Yeah, really.
14. Shawn Marion's Chinese Symbols
I couldn't throw Marquis Daniels in at sixteen without immediately following it with another garbled attempt at Chinese, this time Shawn Marion's "The Matrix" tattoo. Here's Hanzi Smatter's analysis of what went wrong with this one:
The three “Chinese lettering” Mr. Marion sporting does not really translate as “The Matrix” in Chinese.
魔 = demon, evil spirits; magic power
鳥 = bird
樟 = camphor (a plant where its chemical exact is used for making moth balls)
The movie “The Matrix” is translated as 黑客帝国 (“Hackers’ Empire”). “Matrix”, as in mathematical and logical condition, is translated as 矩陣.
13. Paul Pierce's Angel Wings and Heart Tattoo
Reggie Miller set the tone for girly tattoos with the design encircling his belly button, but Paul Pierce blows him out of the water with this monstrosity. Teeny-tiny angel wings? Check. Cutesy heart? Check. Sparkly lines around the whole thing? Check. Oh, and if you can't make it out, the text beneath the tat reads "Chosen One".
12. Richard Jefferson's "RJ" Tattoo
Commonly cited as the worst tattoo in the league, this one actually looks a little better up close. It is still very, very far from being a good tattoo, though. Generally speaking, it's a negative if your body art wouldn't look out of place in a middle-schooler's notebook.
11. Tim Duncan's Wizard Tattoo
It's a wizard. That's all I've got.
Let us know what you thought of this latest batch of crappy tats by leaving a comment below. I'll be back tomorrow with the last part of the list running down the ten worst tattoos in the NBA.