Wednesday , May , 18 , 2011 J.N.

2011 Eastern Finals – Bulls vs. Heat – Sh*t is real

Game 1 is in the books. The Chicago Bulls woke up a lot of critics, 103-82. Led by Derrick Rose’s 28 points and 6 assists, his performance was fine considering that he out dueled Dwyane Wade and LeBron James. Both men did not even dial in 20 points, but Chris Bosh poured in 30 points. Miami’s supporting cast could not get anything going as usual. However, the talk of the night belongs to Taj Gibson’s dunks. One was on Dwyane Wade. The other one, which was a nasty put back, probably destroyed a planet somewhere. Lawd have mercy, things got nasty. Heat fans and critics were shocked. Don’t be. They have been doing the business all season.

Before the Eastern Conference Finals started, plenty of shit talking was going around. And they’re still going around. This is serious business. Internet message boarders placed up money, first borns, screen names, and naked pictures of their girlfriends. This is glorious. Plenty of arrogance from both sides, but the majority of experts chose the Heat to win. Chris Mullin is a proud advocate of the Heat. He should have put up his John Cena hair cut up for grabs. If he loses, he has to grow the Mel Kiper’s George Washington hair.

Most of us know that this battle showcases hardnosed grimy defense against flashy free flowing offense – a clash of idealogies. The storyline sets up three superstars & weak bench versus one league MVP & the Bench Mob.

Game 1 showed us what’s up, didn’t they? Both teams were close until the second half came around. Here is the thing about that – Chicago’s coach Tom Thibodeau and crew usually uses the first half to download the opposition. They take the hit studying what the other team is doing. Then in the second half, the Bulls expose their offensive schemes with the trademark defense. The team is the number one defense in the playoffs since Orlando was eliminated. The Bulls are only allowing 87.3 points and their defensive rating is 100.2, which equates to number one.

Miami better figure it out because if they do not win game 2, they are in trouble. The team that takes the 2-0 lead wins 96 percent of the time, 277-11. The odds are against them. LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh, and the rest have to find ways to counteract the Bulls’ defense. No shit, right? Well, how are they going to do that? Wade and LeBron have to transform into 1988 Michael Jordan. They are not doing that.

The Heat has to bring energy. That is not enough because Joakim Noah, Carlos Boozer, Taj Gibson, Luol Deng, and Omer Asik bring energy, too. Miami just does not have the size to beat them there. The Bulls are the number one rebounding team in the NBA. That is not going to change today or anytime soon so forget that. They are the best offensive and defensive rebounding unit because Noah, Asik, and Taj are right behind Dwight Howard in defensive ratings below 100 according to This is an elite glass unit on steroids. Scary.

LeBron and Wade cannot be leaking out looking for easy stuff in transition. This is not NBA 2K11 although I bet Pat Riley and Eric Spoelstra are playing that right now as we speak. They better remember to turn up the sliders for Chicago’s offensive rebounding. The two huge megastars have to help out on the glass, too.

Guarding Derrick Rose

Do not try it. Respect goes to LeBron to rise up to the challenge to guard the kid, but this strategy is stupid because Bron can’t do it all game long and will be tired to do anything on offense. Miami has to take turns and pray that Rose can’t hit a lick. Or get injured.

A revelation from a message board poster

"Taj Gibson dunked so hard on Dwayne Wade that it moved the Y in his first name to the correct place." Ouch. 


The Miami Heat better win game 2. If not, they’re in huge trouble. I’ll also be disappointed.

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