Monday , Jul , 06 , 2009 J.N.

The Charmed Life of a LA Clipper fan.

The Charmed Life of a LA Clipper fan.Too legit to clip.

We’re not sure about that, Scottie. The situation is beyond hellish for any person supporting the Clippers. One would like to think of Donald Sterling’s Freakish Road Show as silver medalists searching for any way to keep some sort of pace with the power of ten Terminators on a monkey jet powered atom bomb nuclear fused Kobe Bryant-led Lakers. Snapping back to reality, the Clippers are not silver medalists. They probably would not even place in the Entertainer’s Basketball Classic held at Rucker Park. To be a fan of the Clips is to have no regard for your well being. We understand supporting the underdog, but this is similar to rooting for the Detroit Lions, Milwaukee Bucks, Chris Brown, or Carson Daly.

In order to root for the perennial lottery team, we have to understand their mentality. They’re not as threatening as the Raider fan so you can definitely look them in the eye without fear of getting stabbed. Instead, you will see pain, struggle, and heartbreak. Let’s try to understand, shall we?

Affordability – Most likely they cannot afford Laker tickets. They’ll sacrifice to get Clipper tickets to watch the best ruin their franchise in almost every game. Imagine watching Chris Paul, Lebron, and Dwight Howard, and the rest at half the price. Hell, it might even be a third of the price!

To be different – Angelinos cannot all cheer for the purple and gold. Where is the fun in cheering for the ball club that will demolish them in every matchup? A Lakers victory is expected whereas a Clipper victory is unexpected. It’s great to have surprises such as herpes appearing on your lips. I guess it’s more gratifying when Sterling’s team grabs a victory because Clipper fans feel like they actually worked for the win, too. There’s this other notion that being different is cool.

Traffic – After a game, there is no difficulty leaving. Or getting there for that matter.

Players – They always bring in new young talent. Blake Griffin is the latest and greatest, which leaves us to place a self-fulfilling prophecy based on previous traumatic experiences with this franchise. They’ll develop, leave, and probably flourish somewhere else. A few of them called the organization a “jail, prison” while others complained that they did not have any soap when they take showers. They probably did not supply any soap because they lost another game. They simply did not deserve it since they stunk up the place.

So why do Clipper fans exist? More importantly, why does this franchise still exists?

To clean Lakers Championship cases. Perhaps they exist because Kobe denied them autographs. I asked a friend of mine this and he said, {“I’m not a Clipper fan but I do attend Clippers games because I enjoy watching high school sports.” }

This could be a case for love of punishment. They just love it. They relive this Groundhog Day over and over again. It’s a sadistic cycle that has never ended. This losing circle shows us that we should strive to get better with our lives instead of being content. I find it embarrassing to begrudgingly trot out a product that continually does not give back equal value.

Huge shout out to Clipper Darrell. Somebody give him a pat on the shoulder whenever you see him at the games. You can’t miss him with his red and blue suit shouting, “Let’s go Clippers! Let’s go!”