Wednesday , Dec , 15 , 2010 Christopher Sells

DeMar DeRozan Is Mean

Yes, you’ve seen this play all over TV and the Internet since last night. You might actually be tired of it by now, but please allow me to reiterate:

What DeMar DeRozan did to Tyrus Thomas ain’t right. In fact it’s just wrong.

I know that some of you guys fancy yourselves as superb athletes and good shot blockers, but please allow me to give a little bit of friendly advice.

1. If he jumps before you, you’re probably going to get dunked on.

2. If your defensive rotation is even the slightest bit late, you’re going to get dunked on.

3. If he cocks the ball waaaay back, he’s going to absorb the body contact and draw the foul. And you’re going to get dunked on.

Few players are exempt from these rules, Shaq being the most notable of them. Even the most prolific shot blockers get crammed on fairly often (e.g. Alonzo Mourning, Dikembe Mutombo). If you’re an average NBA talent like Thomas, just pretend you’re rotating over and get there too late to contest the dunk. Then look confused and blame another player for not doing their job. You’ll still likely be in the poster, but you won’t be the poster.

I tried to tell you guys that DeRozan was going to catch a few people this year. But Tyrus just didn’t listen, did he?

One more time for the road:



You may now resume your regularly scheduled NBA season.