Tuesday , Jun , 29 , 2010 J.N.

The LeBron Free Agency Madness and Reporters’ Sources

People involved with the NBA and sports media are really sticking their necks and reputations on the line. I love it! Their true colors are shown. We have never witnessed anything like this before. The entire free agency arms race is 10x more explosive than the Big Network’s extravaganza about Brett Favre and his jeans. Everyone has a hard on for LeBron. Analysts on television, print, and radio are arguing against each other over speculations. Speculations? That’s another word for opinion. Get your popcorn and enjoy the freak show! I have!

This started out with people spreading rumors about Bron spotted house shopping in Chicago. Then he was buying houses in New York. People were dapping and smacking each other’s asses like a job well done. Why were people doing this? Absolutely nothing was accomplished. Dwyane Wade questioned Chicago Bulls’ loyalty and that opened up a backlash among hard core Bulls fans and some Chicagoans. Word to Wade – They hate you. They hate you so much that the Chicago Bulls’ management prefers not to talk to you because that would be a waste of time.

I would still talk to Dwyane Wade hoping to gauge what Pat Riley is trying to do. Just saying.

The Summit was a big one spearheaded by Wade yet again. He’s trying to act like the leader, but LeBron said some stuff on the Larry King interview proclaiming that he’s the ring leader. Yeah, you can see why they can work well together in Miami. I hope I get to see it. I really do. People are denying that the Summit took place especially D-Wade. The Summit did happen perhaps over the phone through video conferencing. You do not have to meet in person to have a summit. All parties involved are denying it to avoid tampering charges. World Wide Wes and Maverick Carter are having some kind of power struggle on top of that! This is worse than the BP oil leak.

I wonder what was said during the Summit. I can only imagine.

Wade: What’s up. I brought everyone here. Stop messing around and come to Miami. We get Bron and Bosh, beaches, and bitches. Pat Riley will kick Erik Spoelstra and Michael Beasley off this team if you guys join.

LeBron: Word?

Wade: Yeah. I mean, we just threw a huge birthday party for Udonis Haslem. We can do the same for you minus Udonis Haslem.

Bosh: Whaaaat?

Wade: Yeah. I mean, you said you didn’t want to play center for any team, right? Udonis cannot be a center for us. We dump him and put you at power forward. We threw that birthday party for him to create good publicity. All he got was cake and one of them retro stereo jukebox in damaged packaging.

Bosh: That sounds interesting. Tell me more.

Wade: Yeah. I mean, it would be cool.

LeBron: What about me?

Wade: Don’t worry. I got you a retro stereo jukebox in damaged packaging, too.

LeBron: No no. If I join this team, it’s my team.

Wade: Yeah. I mean, yeah….uhhhh…we’ll have to work out the logistics. I don’t have that big of an ego…Hold up (flashes championship ring to LeBron)…well whatever you know?  

[End of Summit]

Reporters and journalists claim to have sources on where LeBron James is going. Who are these sources? The janitor who usually over hear people’s conversations? The cook? Trainer? Ticket salesperson? Miss Cleo? Grounds keeper Willy? The Russian? The Prostitute? An intern? This situation brings out the best in people arguing over sources all over the media. I love it! I love it because they are just as clueless as you and me. They brag that they have the inside track. Then bet the house in Las Vegas. Put your money where your mouth is.

It’s gotten so epic that teams are dumping players for nothing just to clear up room. Miami dumped most of the team. Chicago dumped Kirk Hinrich and the #17th pick without anything in return. The New York Knicks seemingly got rid of everyone except for The Cock, Wilson Chandler, and Toney Douglas. New Jersey just got rid of Yi Jianlian to Washington.

With the craziness going on, one would think that many people would have pictures or some kind of video showing all of the free agents’ whereabouts. Instead, we barely have anything. That’s odd considering all of the phone cameras we have available. Do not be surprised if any of these reporters made up their sources. Somebody get Kojak on the phone to sift through the bottom of this.

All talk, but no substance. This is a case of purple monkey dishwasher – distortion of facts from one person to the next.

So what did your sources tell you where the 2010 free agents will land?

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